photo credit – anhappynewyear.com
What Difference Did You Make?
She ties her shoes, turns off every light, but leaves the candle burning on the end table where she places her purse and keys. She sits down one last time to scroll through her diary—a calendar. She was given an assignment 365 days in length to accomplish a grand duty–seemed so long at the time, but now so short. Responsibilities from her Noble included giving rain when rain was needed, daylight, darkness, springtime and harvest to the hardworking farmer who planted in the right season. She scrolls through January, reminiscing upon the explosion of excitement that surrounded her arrival. A warm wave of joy goes through her entire being bringing with it a smile hard to suppress. “Oh the joy of newness” she mutters! It felt like just the other day when streets were full of music, dancing, and people whose excitement exceeded their need for sleep. The warm thought is interrupted as her index finger turns the page into February, mixed emotions run through her… as she slowly turns the page to March, every month in between and soon December. Silent tears begin to flow. She reflectively takes a deep sigh, gently resting her head on the cold sofa with her eyes closed. “I guess our time is up” she whispers. A whisper so gentle it can hardly be heard. “They are ready for a New Year” she chokes up, as she struggles to get those seven words out. In just seven days, she will fade into a distant past; never (ever) to return. And just like that—her assignment from the heavens is strangely nothing more than a simple memory. “Did I make a difference?” I hear the year ask her Chief as they walk into her review.
Here’s one review I received today among so many. His beauty says… This one is titled:
Thank God for 2013!!
In 2013 we learned even still that the just shall continue to live by faith; for without faith it is impossible to please God. This year I saw all my sisters (again)!! How that 10 year, heart-aching period I didn’t see them improved my gratitude. This year, my nephew who is my heart and joy & my beautiful niece also graduated high school and defeated defeat with flying colors! I am so proud of them. In 2013 six of my sisters found new jobs many of them having waited for well over a year for a job. Two of them hanged by the shoestrings of grace and I saw God meet their needs one-day-at-a-time. I learned so much about God’s trustworthiness during this time. This year I also reached my 1 yr blogging milestone and met the nicest people while doing it. Reading what other people are writing has both inspired me and strengthened me on days when I really needed it.
On our 5 yr anniversary this year, we visited a church we desired to visit for quite some time (we have never left). The Holy Spirit wooed us –we love our new church beyond what words can actually describe! It is stirring up and awakening things in us that we didn’t even realize were lying dormant and dying but most of all, we love that we can actively worship God! This year, we were also deeply touched by the mercies of Jesus that allowed my sister Gloria (who follows me) to graduate Nursing school at the top of her class! Because she did it mostly without (text books, sleep, parents, money or a reliable car) I was overcome by emotion. I learned so much about the steadfastness of God, how He will plow with us through the hardships to such a desired meaningful end. No words can describe how I felt at this graduation. I can say without any question that this graduation meant more to me than any other graduation I have ever attended (including any of mine).
In August of 2013 we again saw God come through as Father and Provider to my younger sister Linda (#6) who planned the most (Godly) breathtaking weddings we’ve ever seen, on nothing but God’s faithfulness and provision. It’s hard to be a bride without a mom (I’ve been there). Yet there’s a deep seated joy when all your mom’s sisters bring more than just the memory of her presence (in their voices, their words, their hugs, their tears and their dancing)! I learned that God always has someone standing in the gap for us, even when we feel so alone.
In 2013, our daughters turned 2 and 4. Journey started talking (can’t take that for granted), while Joy took her first ever 14-week ballet dance class which she absolutely loved. Parenting our girls has given me such a window into the heart of God, and it has allowed me to “feel” what God must feel toward us (longing for us, planning the next day for us, going ahead of us to pave the way, forgiving and overlooking our offenses toward Him, loving us unconditionally) – of course only a fragment, but even that shred of comprehension has helped me be slightly better a daughter to the Father than I was (without kids). So grateful for my children.
In 2013 many of our good precious friends lost their jobs, others lost their lives, while our native home was attacked by terrorists and many innocent lives taken. Here I learned even more about the importance of Jesus, the cross, forgiveness, salvation and the depravity of man. We no longer take for granted that The LORD Almighty in his mercy – has daily instructed that angel of death to “pass-over” our children’s school, our workplaces, our homes and our roads.
In 2013, I struggled with a dry cough that would not respond to any treatment for over 6 months. Five doctors, many appointments, and many-many prescriptions later with no resolve, I turned my heart to prayer and fasted before my God. By the end of the fast the cough was gone (that was almost 2 months ago). Oh the wonders of our God, how unsearchable! So amazing what I learned through that experience. You Oh’ God are still Jehovah Ropheka! The LORD our Healer! Of course miracles still happen.
This too will be there year when we heard God bidding us to “come” and as Elisha (who broke the yoke and sacrificed the ox so that he would never return to his old life when God led Elijah to appoint him as his successor)… we too packed up the house and left our home in Austell where we’ve built many precious memories — In order that we may center our lives around our Source of Life (as the majestic eagle). It took God and His strength to help us pack up our home and move. Packing while working full-time with small children and actually moving is in itself a miracle of God in the making! Counting the cost and daring to trust our God in spite all the odds that stood against us and our home just like Zerubbabel—we did it (with the help of our God)! And as Zerubbabel, we now hear God say “What are you, O mighty mountain? Before Zerubbabel you will become level ground”. “Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit”, says the LORD Almighty!” (Zechariah 4:6 & 7)
Number of nights we spent in the hospital in 2013 – 0
Number of nights we went hungry – 0
Number of nights we were naked and without clothes? – 0
Number of days incarcerated – 0
Number of car accidents – 0
Number of house fires – 0
Number of break-ins – 0
Number of nervous breakdowns – 0
BEST 2013 Christmas Quote: “The Wise Still Seek Him”
The Verse I’m taking from 2013 into 2014: “Sow for yourselves righteousness, reap the fruit of unfailing love, and break up your unplowed ground; for it is time to seek the LORD, until he comes and showers righteousness on you.” [Hosea 10:12]
THE Song God has used to carry me through 2013: Be Still My Soul (Selah)
To The Year 2013: We count our blessings. We name them one by one. As into the distance you fade, know that as a year intended by God, you did make a difference for many – especially for me. Thank you for the 52 weeks and weekends, the 26 paychecks, the 358 mornings, the sun that shined and dried the tears and the rain, the rain that unlocked the power of each seed and grain, the old friends who proved even more true and the new ones you brought my way. Thank you for every new song I heard, every answered prayer, every shoe and shirt that fit, every birthday and bath I could take and every minute you gave me with my God! I realize that if I had not been given the gift of YOU–2013, I would not be here at 5 am this morning finishing this post. Thank You for giving me weeks, days, minutes, seconds (whether difficult or fun) as a platform to be a-LIVE and continue to serve my God!
